I'm just a girl in the world. This is my own little space to express what I'm feeling. Diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety, panic disorder and OCD tendencies which makes life hell most of the time. This is my little place so if it bugs you, feel free to click yourself away. **Trigger Warning (for some pictures/posts)**
Archive
Ask me anything
It's whatever
When you have those moments of just being down, even when you’re out with friends and there’s a moment of silence and you realize that even with all these people with you, you’re still so alone. When you feel so alone and feel a mess and feel not worth anything, when tears prick in your eyes and you don’t even know why, when you just suddenly stare into space with your loneliness until one of your friends clap to try and get your attention.
Lets play a game. You pretend you love me and send me a question and i’ll answer. It’s so fun and everyone wins.
The nights when you lay in bed thinking about life. Wondering if it is worth the fight or not. Tonight is that kind of night. The sad thing is, I don’t see the point of fighting anymore. I don’t see the point of life in general anymore. Life is meaningless and worthless. Death is all that I want and all that I see. I just really want to die because there isn’t a point in living any longer.
I’m the girl who is lost in space, the girl who is disappearing always, forever fading away and receding farther and farther into the background. Just like the Cheshire cat, someday I will suddenly leave, but the artificial warmth of my smile, that phony, clownish curve, the kind you see on miserably sad people and villains in Disney movies, will remain behind as an ironic remnant. I am the girl you see in the photograph from some party someplace or some picnic in the park, the one who is in fact soon to be gone. When you look at the picture again, I want to assure you, I will no longer be there. I will be erased from history, like a traitor in the Soviet Union. Because with every day that goes by, I feel myself becoming more and more invisible.
— Elizabeth Wurtzel (via modernmethadone)
